Autism - Vacation (part 1)

What can I say about vacationing? It always seems like I need a vacation from the vacation. My family did manage to skate past all the drama that went along with visiting Grammy, uncles, aunts, and cousins. I am actually pretty happy about that! What may sound like a simple thing to do, is not so simple when you combine the personalities, schedules and priorities of 17 people. Let me break it down for you:


My family

1. We need a daily plan. Every morning, my son will demand to know what we are doing all day long. He will drill you for what will happen next until you finish with bedtime. So, that is a priority..a schedule of events. The problem: there really were no events scheduled, so this was left up to me. Other problem: the weather was not cooperating. A bit of a nightmare for us when our kids spend a majority of their time in outdoor activities (playground, little pool, riding bikes etc.) I did have projects up my sleeve, but was hoping that on vacation we could break away from the norm.
2. We have some dietary constraints because my son is a very picky eater (as many children on the spectrum are). We generally never leave home w/o a "bag" filled with a bagel or juice or cheezits, pretzels etc. This alleviates the stress of going out to a restaurant that does not have something on the menu my son would eat. Though I bring the bag "backup", I never like to leave my son out of anything. If we order Dunkin Donuts, I order a bagel for him (whether he eats it or not). If we go out to lunch, I try to order chick nuggets or grilled cheese for him (will never eat the nuggets and the grilled cheese has to look just right). It is all about including him with us and never making him feel separated. Trust me, it is worth the $3 or more to make him feel part of the group.

Siblings w/babies

1. Needed to be at a place of rest for the morning and/or afternoon naps. That pretty much takes care of the whole day or may only leave an hour for a quick trip. Needless to say, many times the whole family didn't spend time all together. It's not the fault of anyone, just the stage a family is in. It is hard when there are babies.
2. Bottles, diapers, and cargo during any outing. Lord have mercy, thank goodness I am past that stage! I am very happy with my lunch bag backup.

Sibling w/older children

1. How much do you think the older children wanted to go feed the ducks? Yay for the jumping pillow, though there still was the endurance of my son's relentless need to go to the mall and visit the carousel. And YES, we had no choice. When it is on my son's list, it is what we need to do for him to make his day complete. .. so sorry to my family.
2. More independence- That's a wonderful thing for a parent (sibling). Unfortunately, the other parents(us) need to oversee much of the play in order to provide adequate engagement opportunities and police the socialization between peers. Many times, we found ourselves watching all the children while the rest of the family enjoyed their own time together. Not exactly relaxing.

Mother w/ food prep schedule

1. The days centered around food prep, meals, and eating. This type of obsession "bit" into the daily events and enjoyment of family time. We eat when we are hungry. Yes, usually it happens around the same times each day, but is taken care of at the time the hunger pains occur. Prep is not needed....throw hot dogs on the grill, chips and (tah-dah)...a meal for all. 5-10 minutes.
2. Again the food schedule. Immediately after breakfast we were all being asked about lunch and dinner....too much time on this!
3. Did I mention about meal times? Ugh!...so annoying-especially when one of my kids will only eat a handful of items that requires so little time. Such an unnecessary stress to the week.

So this was the set up for our family (reunion)vacation. All and all, many things learned (part 3), so there is a definite positive side to all the confusion. Fun had by all...not quites so sure about that. The kids did enjoy being with their Grammy, aunts, uncles, and cousins. That in itself was the reason for the trip.

I regret to tell you all that this is only part 1 of my vacation series. Stay tuned for part 2 - Vacation (Socialization deficits) and Part 3 Vacation (learned & on list)

**Make sure you check out the jumping pillow link. It was really great for the kids. My son loved it. The pillow was possibly the one thing that kept our sanity. It was outside and provided such great feedback that really helped keep my son centered throughout the day.